Sunday, June 24, 2012

"Spot On"

As we all know, life is a journey, a progression through multiple stages from infancy to childhood, teens, adulthood, middle age, to aging, old age, and ultimately to the final destination that comes to us all....(except for me, of course, as I have decided that  the old 1960s slogan is my new motto...."Hell No, I Won't Go!")

Anyway, back to the matter at hand, each of those stages brings adventure, experience, and change.  It's all part of that Circle of Life thing.  I'm okay with that mostly.  I'm not the same person I was 50 years ago and that is as it should be.  I simply don't have the energy to be 16 years old!  I don't even want the same things I wanted at 16 (well, except maybe for Danny A. who was the great unrequited love of my life before I met Mikey!)

I have suffered the "slings and arrows of outrageous fortune...." just like everyone has.  You can't get through living without experiencing some of those.  Some were good, some were bad, and some were painful, some were heavenly and some were just a hoot!  But what I never realized until recently is that all those times that life (or whatever) throws an arrow our way, it leaves a mark!  Really, it does!  Some sort of visible, permanent outward sign that you have taken another bullet!  ( Hmmm, Mrs. Proctor always told us not to mix our metaphors, but I think you know what I mean!)

That is the only explanation for the latest phenomenon to befall me.  I've gotten used to the grey hair.  My knees feel ten years older than the rest of me.  I've learned to compensate.  Gravity keeps pulling me down (trying to get me into that grave before my time??!!) and my skin continues to be overwhelmed by the downward pressure.  Things droop, sag, wiggle, fade, dry out, wrinkle, and no longer hold their shape.  Somethings seem to just up and disappear (like lips); other things just suddenly look different (like eyelids); and still other things pop up or out or sink into the abyss of "maturity!"  My whole body looks like a comfortable old pair of sweat pants!  No color, no shape, no crispness.

But lately  I am noticing an exponential increase in souveniers from those "slings and arrows!" that just adds insult to injury!  

I have SPOTS.  Lots and lots of spots.  More spots every day!  Big spots, little spots, sort of like paint spatters.  They are called wens, or tags, or moles, or euphemistically, freckles, but what they are, are SPOTS and they are making me crazy!!   

And they are all over!  Arms have the most because of sun exposure, but I have them on my legs, my back, my neck, there are even a couple on my forehead!  Nothing says "old" as clearly and obviously as SPOTS!
I've always had pretty good skin and this is just NOT FAIR!  (Yeah, yeah, whoever said life was fair??)  

Still, spots?? Seriously? What's next???  Polka dots??  Stripes?!? 

I'm beginning to look like a freakin' Dalmation!!   If you see me chasing a fire truck, call for help!

PLEASE NOTE:  Of course, I am exaggerating. Don't worry Ratchlet and LS, my doctor is keeping a close eye on the things and they are NOT  the dangerous kind.  Basically, all they are, are....spots!


  1. I know exactly what you mean. Everything seems to be going South. I hate it when that happens. I am noticing that where my skin has always been rather oily, it's now getting dry and scaly. I have never used any kind of lotion, but finally bought something to sorta help the scales on my forehead. No spots yet, but the old scars from working in a less than desirable environment for so many years (read here: before teaching) seem to be more pronounced. Especially a burn I received on my forehead years ago when I got to close to an open press at 340 degrees F. I leaned just a little bit too close. The scar used to be almost invisible after it healed, now it's sorta brownish and looks like a mini washboard about the size of a small stamp. Oh well, I will wear my scars proudly. As we age, that is about all we have to be proud of!


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