Part of the problem right now is that there really is not much going on in my life. The fact of the matter is that I just "Don't Get Around Much Anymore." In fact, it's been deadly quiet and boring.
I've had another setback in my theater efforts (again!) and that has really depressed me. Also that means I'm not involved in anything having to do with theater right now. And to be honest, I am running out of time. Who knows how long I will stay healthy and energetic enough to take on the responsibility for a show. If I'm not getting the opportunities I wish for, it means that there is that much less in the way of possibilities.
And I appear to have no other interests! How annoying. My darling daughter pretty regularly lets me know about different activities and events she thinks I might enjoy. I appreciate her efforts but somehow I never manage to actually do any of them.
Well, I am still reading a lot, but that's not very interesting to write about. My reading material is pretty much all, light-hearted and and predictable, but most "good" books just don't hold my interests anymore.
The Big Guy is working all the time, (six days a week 3 to 11:30 pm) so my days are left to my own devices and I am the least self motivated person I know. I'm not what you call a self-starter, I never have been! Give me an assignment and I will jump on it, but left up to me, I just don't have any interest in doing much besides sitting at the computer. And we all know how productive that is! HA! Besides if I'm not doing anything, there really isn't anything to say!
Basically, I think I am just plain bored and there is nothing more conducive to depression than a boring and un-motivated life. I am a slug. Bleech!
Maybe tomorrow will be a better day....or the next day....
Aw! C'mon Mel. There has to be something interesting you could be doing. Volunteering at the local center for seniors can be rewarding. I go once a week for 2 hours and volunteer my time. That's enough for me, but I find it rewarding. Does Austin have an adult chorus? I wish my community had one, cause I'd be the first one there. I know you aren't a hobby person, but perhaps taking an audited class at the University would interest you.
ReplyDeleteI know, I am sounding all gung-ho, aren't I. Just trying to maybe help you out of your rut. I know that for anything interesting to happen, you some times have to go looking for it. And that's not an easy thing. Our community has just started a "free clinic" and I am thinking of volunteering there maybe a day or two a month. They need people to answer phones, take medical info from patients etc. I could do that. Please, please, don't just sit at home and be bored. Get out among 'em, and let them know that you are a woman with smarts, education, and drive, and you will find something to fill that boring time, and get rewards that you can't imagine. Go for it!!!
I am sorry you are feeling at a low point in your life, Mellodee. That is never a good thing-to be bored and uninterested in what is happening. I hope you can find something that sparks your interest. xo Diana
ReplyDeleteMellodee....get a camera...look at the world through a camera lens and write about it in your wonderful and creative writing style. I think your just in a season and it soon shall pass but you need to take the first step. HUGS. Dee
ReplyDeleteThe older we get the harder it is for us to even want to "get around." I dearly love staying home, and some days dread the fact that I have something going on. Usually, I go do what I have to, and have a good time once I get there. My HS class is having their 50th reunion this summer. I refuse to go. My kids think I should, but for various reasons I just don't want to. It's way to expensive for where they are having it. And, I already see the classmates I want to keep in touch with on a semi regular basis, so why pay upwards of $50 to go eat with a bunch of people I don't care that much about, weren't friends with in HS anyway, and with whom I have absolutely nothing in common. NOT! Talk about depressing and not getting around much anymore. This is a great example of me just not giving a care anymore. LOL! I guess I should have blogged this instead of commenting, but you get what I mean. Others don't.
ReplyDeleteACT your way out of it! (smile)
ReplyDelete