"Things I Couldn't Say" (aka Dear So and So)

It's a long time since I have posted a new batch of "Things I Couldn't Say" or Dear So and So.....but today is the day!! 

Dear Makers of....uhhh....Stuff ,

The other night I was sitting in my house, piddling and puttering around, minding my own business. when I realized I could hear someone talking.  The TV was not on, the computer was muted, it was too clear to be coming from outside.  It being nighttime, of course, I was home alone.  Needless to say, I was a bit frightened...uhhh... intrigued, and I had to track it down immediatly before panic set in....uhh...I called 911..uhhh...to identify the source.

Using my precise and keen sense of hearing....uhhh....By the process of elimination, I realized it was coming from the master bedroom.  Hmmm, that's odd.  There is no way in or out of that room except by the doorway from the small hallway off the family room.  I gingerly opened the door and immediately realized that the voices were coming from the new clock/radio the Big Guy just got.  For whatever reason, it had turned itself on.  (I want you to know that I am using great restraint here in not taking this post off in a completely different direction brought to mind by that phrase!!)

Okay, well, mystery solved, no intruders, no danger Will Robinson, nothing but an alarm set to the wrong time!  Wheeew!!  Relief.

So, you might say, why am I bothering you about this??  Aha!  We come to the crux of the matter!!
Pay attention, this is important.

The little clock radio in its rather attractive, yet sleekly techno looking design, had 7 "buttons" that were the controls.  They were labelled with very small letters chiseled into the metal of the case.
In a dimly lit room, by a set of 65 year of eyes, these letters were nearly impossible to read.  Not to worry, one of them had to be the power switch to turn the darned thing off.

EXCEPT THAT NOT ONE OF THOSE LITTLE BUTTONS DID ANYTHING TO TURN OFF THE RADIO!!!!  This wasn't brain surgery here, I just wanted to get rid of the noise!  I tried all sorts of combinations, different sequences, whatever I could think of.  I was nearly at the point of picking it up and hurling it against the wall!  Finally, after ten minutes of the damn thing blasting in my ears, something I did (I have no clue what) finally turned it off.  Ahhhhhhh!

My question?  Would it really be so detrimental to your "design concept", to CLEARLY MARK the on/off, power button???  There was nothing on the thing that was of any help at all!  Nothing!  No little red light, nothing that even said "start here, dummy"  Nothing, Nada, Zip!

It seems to me to be a perfect example of design over function run amok!  It really shouldn't take a Masters degree in electrical engineering to just turn the damn thing off!

I have just two more words for you.....FIX THIS!!

Disgustedly,
Mel

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Dear Whomever,

I don't know who made the decision to completely eliminate the concept of a person on the staff of gas stations being there to help motorists re-fuel their cars, but it was a sucky decision!  Yes, yes, I understand about saving money by pumping it yourself, but there are times when having someone around who was there to HELP their customers (i.e., in bad weather, when a driver is impaired by an injury, in a real hurry, whatever) would be worth a few more cents a gallon!  Especially since we are already paying nearly $3.50 a gallon!!

Little old-ish ladies shouldn't have to stand outside in freezing temps, with a sharp wind, blowing icy sleet particles which feel like little shards of glass, directly into one's face just to get gas in their tank!

Just seems like good customer service to me!  You remember when that was a goal of every company, don't you?  I do!

Frozenly,
Mel

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Dear E-Bay Users,

Could all of you who are looking for the perfect art deco stained glass lampshade just go outside and play for a while?  My Mikey has been looking for days for just the right shade for a vintage lamp he bought.  He keeps getting outbid at the last minute (second??)  He is getting discouraged.  Mikey has very little patience and when he wants something, he wants it NOW.  All you last minute bidders are spoiling his fun.  He's getting a little testy....in fact, he's almost snarky.

So, could you all just go do something else for a while so that he can get the right shade and put us....uhh.....him out of his misery?  Please??!

Pleadingly,
The Big Guy's Wife

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Dear Judges of Science Fairs (Austin version),

Tomorrow is the Regional Science Fair for grammar school kids (ages 8-11) in the Austin School District.  I am asking, as the grandmother of one of the exhibitors, that you please give close attention to the effort of one fifth-grader whose project (relating to reading facial expressions....i.e., real vs fake smiles) is dear to my heart.  Actually, it's not the project that's dear, it's the exhibitor!

It would be lovely for that smart, not so little 5th grade to take home a ribbon for her effort.  It was an interesting concept and she executed it very well.  She deserves a ribbon.  Doesn't matter which one (3rd, 2nd, 1st, even Honorable Mention), any of them would do.

After three years of projects, this is the first one that has advanced to this level.  It would be a real boon to her to be recognized! 

So what do you say?  Give the kid a ribbon, huh?  She would really be happy!

(GO M-T-G!!)

A Loving and Proud Grammy,
Mel

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Dear Users of E-readers,

I just have a quick observation to share with you. 

I think it's a real pity that all the various e-readers, like the Kindle and Nook, are not made, marketed, and sold by companies other than booksellers.  Perhaps then the e-book offerings would be priced more reasonably and the selections offered for "free" or at least inexpensively, would be more than just a clearing house for self-published, poorly written, poorly edited, dreck!

And could someone please explain to me what the hell is the point of a Kindle Single, and why I should want to buy one???

I read quickly and go through books like water.  Buying best sellers would break the bank in the blink of an eye!  It is very clear that the e-reader is not for the convenience of the reader, it is for the profit of the publishers and booksellers!

I'm beginning to miss the Library!

Mel

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Dear Blogland,

If you like Dear So and So, and want to give it a try, just pop over to Kat's Place at Three Bedroom Bungalow ( http://3bedroombungalow.blogspot.com/ ), hook up with her Linky and add your own! It's a great way to blow off steam, and you can read lots of other letters even grumpier than mine!!

Your friend,
Mel