Friday, September 30, 2011

"Things I Couldn't Say" (aka Dear So and So)

Dear So and So...


And again Friday has arrived and with it a new batch of "Things I Couldn't Say" or Dear So and So.....


Dear Dream-maker,

You need to re-think the way you do the dreams that pop-up during my sleep-time.  A lot of the time, my dreams (at least, those that I remember) are completely nonsensical; filled with people I don't know in places I've never been and are just a confused mess.  I suppose there is some message there but I sure don't know what it is.  I can easily dismiss those dreams as just a way of cleaning out the clutter in my mind.  No value-added, if you know what I mean.

But the ones that really annoy me are the ones that do make sense....sort of.  When I dream of real people that I actually know, most of the time I am pursuing some goal and never quite getting there.  Sometimes there is a real sense of urgency or a very strong desire to reach whatever I'm yearning for but I just can't make whatever it is happen.  Those dreams leave me feeling frustrated, thwarted, and miffed (to say the least.) 

So please, couldn't I succeed occasionally??  Couldn't I wake up feeling triumphant or happy or fulfilled once in a while?  Pretty please!  I'm really tired of waking up feeling like a failure when all I have been doing is trying to sleep!!

Grumpily,
Mel



Dear Writing Muse,

I would like to lodge a complaint.  How could you let me tell all my best stories early in my Blogging days?  As I look back, some of those early posts were great (she said modestly!)  They were the real highlights of my life and experiences.  Now that I've written about so many of the times that were really important or special in my life, all I am left with is the dreck!

It gets harder and harder to find topics that inspire or entertain because I've used up all the good stuff!

And it's all your fault!!  Have you never heard of pacing?  Conservation of resources? 

Thanks a lot, pal!

Blankly,
Mel


Dear People of the World,

OK, listen up!  I am mighty sick of all the know-it-alls, fanatics, extremists, rabid loudmouths that keep trying to push the rest of us into doing things their way!  I don't want to participate in your beliefs, religions, cults, politics, diets, cultures, or life-styles.  I am not interested, trust me!  And bottom-line?  Most of what you are pushing is self-serving, manipulative, claptrap that is not much more than the thinly-veiled actions of a big bully, a greedy, two-faced narcissist ....or a wigged-out lunatic.  I don't want to associate with you.  I don't want to follow you.  I don't want to go to your gathering places.   I don't want you running my government at any level --- not local, regional, national, or world-wide.  I don't want to watch you in the media.  I don't want you to exist in my world!  Go away!!

On the other hand, I know that there are still people who believe in tolerance, balance, fairness, honesty, integrity, logic, science, truth, compassion and vision.  We desperately need these people to step up and take on stronger roles in all aspects of society.  They need to become the leaders we crave.  Where are the disciples of Adams, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Truman?  Where are you??  Please stop hiding!!  The rest of us need you!  Because we feel abandoned and fearful at the lack of reason and unselfish leadership in our world, and we are slowly going mad.

Getting desperate!
Mel



Dear Clothing Manufacturers,

I would like to inform you of a few realities of life.  People get old.  Bodies change.  Old doesn't mean stupid or blind.  This is particularly true of women.  Women of a certain age still enjoy wearing fashionable and new clothes.  However, what looks terrific on a size 2, 5'7" 19-year-old with a killer figure does NOT look even close to terrific on a size 14, 5'2", 60-year-old woman with a "pouchy" stomach! 

For instance, low-riders and mid-rise jeans and pants just add emphasis to a tummy that has expanded over time from pregnancy, a life-time of food, and age!  I refuse to wear the only alternative that is readily available:  polyester pants with elastic waists!  YUCK!

In case you were not aware, this year (2011) 7,000 people will turn 65 EACH AND EVERY DAY!  About half of them are women....with "pouchy" tummies.  Couldn't you try a little harder to come up with clothes that flatter rather than emphasize the shape of a mature woman?

Chubbily,
Mel


Dear Magazine Publishers.

I may have mentioned this before, but along the same lines as the letter to clothes makers above, your readers age.  As they age things change, like vision.  Nearly everyone requires glasses sometime after reaching 40 years old.  And the vision just keeps deteriorating over time.  Research has been done which shows that as people get older, they need more and brighter light to be able to see.  By the time one hits their 60s, they need 40% more light in order to read standard print!  Therefore, if your readers include a large proportion of the aging population, using a colored ink on a dark background with smaller than average print size is really not a good idea! 

If you want me to buy your magazine, how about making sure I can actually SEE what it says!

Blearily,
Mel


Dear Users of Electronic Costumer Service Menus,

Whoever came up with the concept of electronic menus for conducting business with companies that deal with the public was a cruel and heartless beast!

These menus have multiple options, but none ever fit exactly what I need.  To have to punch in number after number just leads to mistakes and having to start over.  A lot of time they don't offer ANY OPTION  for talking to a living, breathing, human being!  That is ridiculous!!

The main function of these systems seems to be the creation of anger, frustration, and complete lack of "customer service".  When there is a problem, I don't want to talk to a recording, I want to talk to a person!  How hard should that be???  We purchase your merchandise, we use your services, we pay for the privilege.  Can't you do better for the people who actually keep your company in business??  Really doesn't seem like too much to ask!

Alienated,
Mel

5 comments:

  1. I hate clothing manufacturers. Just because I am not a size 2 does not mean I want to wear a tent in an unflattering floral pattern. *shudders at the thought* Hang in there and continue to fight the good fight against polyester.

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  2. Being a man, I don't have to worry about style too much, because it doesn't change that often. I still have some "super narrow and super wide ties" that might come back into style!!! I like to look nice, tho, and pants manufacturers don't take into account that as a guy ages, he sags, too. They need to make pants that fit!
    Otherwise, to your blog, I can only say "Amen, and amen!"

    ReplyDelete
  3. I thought of something else I wanted to add! To the loudmouths and etc: I had enough of your types when I worked in industry. Then add the younger generation of you that I had in school, who incidentally, probably learned it from you, and I have had all I can stand! Politicians, including the ever-loud and lying current president, should all just take a hike! We could use some new, honest blood in the offices that you now occupy. Okay...off the soap box!

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  4. I agree about print on certain coloured paper.I have difficulty seeing some print in my little boys story books at night,it's not good!

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  5. LOL loved this post! To the clothing manufacturers...
    It's terrible at 60 but 75 year old are...well..we might as well be dead because then we would not need any clothes. Would that make you HAPPIER!!! Sheesh!
    Sorry, Mellodee..I ..sort of lost it there for a minute!
    Love and hugs,
    Mona

    ReplyDelete

Thanks so much for leaving a comment. It's really nice knowing what you think!! Besides, comments keep me from feeling like I'm here all by myself!! :)

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