It's
Dear Visitors, Followers, Lurkers, and Folks who just landed here accidentally,
Let's try something completely different today, shall we?? If you are reading this, LEAVE A COMMENT. I'm not asking for "War and Peace" you understand, just a simple note....like "Hi, dropped in for a visit. Enjoyed your postings. Thought I'd say hello!" You could even leave a comment on why you don't comment!!
See, isn't that simple?? It would make me very happy. Really!
(JE and C.Beth and Mona are exempt from this exercise! They always comment!)
Lonely here by myself,
Mel
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Our Dear Wonderful, Darling, Delightful Automobiles,
In the last several weeks we have had a lot of activity revolving around repairs to you both. Although none of it was your fault precisely, we are ready to have both our very own cars back. No more accidents. No more faulty gas, fuel, melted, tank, pump, shorted out thing to go Boom! No more rental cars that are too big for our garage. No more new tires, or oil changes. No more anything that costs us money that I'd really rather spend on other things. We are done, thank you very much. So, little Kia and zoom-zoom Mazda, could we just please straighten up and fly right for a while (so to speak)....please!
Sweetly,
Drive 1 and Driver 2
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Dear Insurance Company,
Thank you for being so prompt and efficient in getting all the various "car things" paid for recently. Having you take care of the car rentals was particularly helpful. Nice touch! I have just one more tiny little request, please do not raise my rates because of the accident. Not that I would expect that from such a well-run company like yours! But just in case there is some actuary or clerk or hatchet man lurking somewhere in your organization bumping up premiums anytime there is any kind of payout....please keep him away from our account. We already pay the moon! (Does anybody even know what an actuary is, for pete's sake?)
Thriftily,
Mel
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Dear Mother Nature,
Could you please forward this on to whomever it is in your organization who is in charge of rain for Texas. Thanks.
Just to remind you, this drought thing is getting pretty old, you know? Yes, I know there has been some rain, but seriously, would you please stop goofing around! Little showers that last for 20 minutes just ain't cutting it! There is more to ending a drought than getting just enough water to make the
Thirstily,
Mel
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Dear Self,
Would you please get up off your derriere and take the stupid driving course, already!
They couldn't make it much simpler. It's on-line, for heaven's sake! No dopey class to sit through with a bunch of really bad "funny" instructors and a lot of other crummy drivers. You can take it here, in your very own home, in your jammies and everything. I've even heard that you can take it in sections, so you don't have to spend hours to get through it all.
What are you waiting for?? The 90 days you have to get it done are slipping away and if you don't get it done....you're going to have to go to court, pay the full fine, and STILL probably have to take the test. That's enough stalling! Get it done!
Get it in gear!
Me
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Dear Retailers,
Okay, this has got to stop! You are totally out of control. You are forcing everyone to begin to function on the retailers' calendar and it is making me crazy!! Today is 11/18. Thanksgiving is still six (6) full days away. No matter how ridiculous it is, according to you all, Christmas is upon us!
There is not a pilgrim or a turkey, or an autumn napkin ring to be had anywhere!! Believe me, I have looked! A week before the holiday and as far as the stores go, it's too late to get anything for your Thanksgiving celebration! Thanksgiving is finished! That's nuts! (You can't find nuts either!) You are totally wrecking the lives of last-minute shoppers!
What are you going to do about Christmas? Will we have to get our shopping finished by December 1??? Buy our Easter bunnies in January? Our 4th of July sparklers by St. Patrick's Day?? Really, I am here to tell you, you've gone too far!
Grumpily,
Mel
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Dear Blogland,
If you like Dear So and So, and want to give it a try, just pop over to Kat's Place at Three Bedroom Bungalow ( http://3bedroombungalow.blogspot.com/ ), hook up with her Linky and add your own! It's a great way to blow off steam, and you can read lots of other letters!
But first, LEAVE A COMMENT!
Your friend, Mel
Dear Mellodee,
ReplyDeleteI've decided not to comment on this post since you gave me permission not to.
Sincerely,
C. Beth
;-)
Okay, exempt or not, I have to comment. It does gripe me that insurance companies raise rates for one little mishap (or even a speeding ticket). Fortunately, I haven't had this happen, but my wife did and so have both my children in their driving careers.
ReplyDeleteEvery time I have my car serviced, I breathe a sigh of relief when they hand me the multi-point inspection sheet and it's all "green to go." I have had enough car expense to sympathize with you.
Personally, I would like to send some of our rain to you. I have had enough, and as I type this I notice that it is gray and gloomy out there and that the doppler guy says more rain is coming! I think Mother Nature is going through a severe case of PMS!
AND, as far as retailers getting a jump on the holidays, you are so right. I did see Thanksgiving napkins and paper plates at Dollar Tree the other day. Not many, mind you. (Who eats Thanksgiving dinner on paper plates anyway?) I am a frustrated Christmas shopper this year anyway, and having to battle the ever-growing mass of Christmas glitter just adds to it. What ever happened to being able to order gifts from Sears or "Monkey Ward" catalogs and stopping by there to pick them up. Those were the days.
Maybe it's just because we're getting up there in years, and experience, that we're frustrated and get seriously grumpy! Hang in there, Mel, and get on that driving test!!!
Sincerely,
Warren Peace,
AKA Jimmieearl
Who is Pete? And why is everything for HIS sake????
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, sister mine, take the driving course TODAY!!!!
With much love, LS
I had the notion that Texas was now getting it's fair share of moisture. Guess I'm wrong. I'd send you some of our snow if I could. I already shovel every day but it keeps me fit and eliminates those tedious arm exercises. :)
ReplyDeleteI actually know an actuary! Don't know what she actually does, but at least I know one!
ReplyDeleteOh I don't think I'd cope very well with Thanksgiving as well as Christmas! Far too grumpy to be cheerful for that long ;)
ReplyDelete