Friday, April 2, 2010

"Isn't It Romantic?"

In looking back over my postings, I realize I've written about my mom and dad, my daughter, my sister, my granddaughter, assorted aunts, uncles, and cousins, as well as friends, used-to-be friends, and almost friends, plus a few random people that have flitted in and out of my life. But I have not said very much about the Big Guy.  Today is the perfect day to begin to correct that, because April 2 marks the anniversary of the day we were wed....44 years ago!   (Yowza!)

We were married when I was 19 and Mikey was a month shy of 21.  Of course at the time we didn't think it was all that young.  I can't post a photo to show how young we really were.  If you have been reading my Musings for a while, you will remember that I do not have one single solitary photograph of us, the wedding, the church, the bridal party, the flowers, the cake, the reception, my family, his family, the priest, or anything else from that day. Nothing. 
(Click here to find out why Photography)

The best I can do is tell you about it a bit.  It was a bright, sunny, but quite cold day in Chicago.  We were married in a small chapel that was part of Mikey's parish and the officiant was a friend of his.  My cousin, Sherry, was my maid-of-honor, our good friend, Dan was the best man.  I carried a bouquet of yellow roses. My dress was ivory.  My dad walked me down the aisle and our friends and family filled the little chapel. 

When I first saw Mikey that day, he was standing at the front of the chapel with the priest and the best man.  He looked scared to death.  I thought it was so sweet.  I remember thinking that he was so serious and never even smiled at me once.  I thought it was because he was nervous that everything would go well.  I knew he would always take care of me and make sure everything was right.  I was wildly in love!

It wasn't a full Mass in the big 2/3 empty church, because I didn't want  that (nearly had a breakdown in front of the dopey parish priest...not Mikey's friend!...who tried to coerce me into it anyway.)  The little chapel was perfect, small and filled to the rafters, the ceremony short but meaningful, and the whole thing seemed over in a flash and it was done.  We were married!

We did the receiving line at the chapel and then traveled to the home of my aunt, who opened her home to us for a reception.  We had cake, we had food, we had presents, we had music, we had dancing, we had laughter and even a few tears, we had family and friends, it was beyond great, it was just what I wanted! 

Long after that day (and I mean by years), I finally realized that there was one element that we hadn't even thought about.  There was no music at the chapel.  None, at all.  Dad walked me down the aisle in silence, communion was silent, no soloist, no ensemble, Mikey and I headed back down the aisle in silence after it was done.  No music at all.  It was a little eerie.

Now this is significant because, if I may remind you, Mikey and I met in college choir, we were both still active members of that choir.  The little chapel was overflowing with singers and musicians from the choir.   Our best man's girlfriend was a wonderful pianist.  There was even a piano in the chapel!  Yet, not one of us, even gave it a thought, well, at least I didn't.  Even if everyone had just hummed, it would have been better than silence!

Even now after all these years, I still cannot believe we let that happen.  Music has been crucial to our lives and we never thought about it.  Hmmppff.  If in some universe, I ever go through a wedding ceremony again, you can bet that music will be the second thing I arrange for!!  (The first will be for multiple photographers!!) 

Anyway, back to Mikey a bit.  When we were in the car riding from the church to the ceremony, I mentioned to him how sweet I thought he looked all scared and nervous at the front of the chapel.  Mikey didn't say much.  I probably went on and on about it a bit, as I am wont to do!  Finally, he broke down and admitted that he wasn't scared about the wedding or the marriage or our future; he was trying desperately to keep from throwing up!!!   It seems the guys had taken Mikey out for a bit of a bachelor party the night before the wedding.  Not having much experience with liquor (they were all underage!), they didn't have access to much in the way of booze.  Somehow they managed to scrape up several different things. Unfortunately, they finished every drop they were able to procure and some of it was just one step up from rotgut!  They ran out of mixers, so by the end they were using grape juice and root beer to mix with really bad bourbon.  My loving, shy, nervous bridegroom was, for the first time in his life, hungover!  

I was a bit upset that day, but it was a long time ago and now I think it is just hysterical!  

So it was 44 years ago today that we tied the knot.  That's a really long time.  Happy Anniversary, Bunky!

There are very few of those who came to our wedding who are still alive.  Mikey's mom and my parents are gone, the aunts and uncles and some of the cousins are gone.  My maid of honor and the best man are both gone.  We lost touch with most of the friends.  Besides Mikey and I, the only ones who are still a part of our lives are my Lil Sis (who was 7 at the time), Mikey's siblings and their kids, and our good friend, Bonnie, the aforementioned pianist!

It was a lovely wedding and I'm grateful to Mom and Dad, Aunt Pinkie, Sherry, Dan, who made it happen, and to all our friends who there to wish us well.  Most of them would probaly be pretty surprised that we are still together after all these years.  But we knew.  We were commited and we were in love.  "Isn't it romantic?"  Mikey and I have had a marriage like many do, good times, bad times, and every thing in between, we've both changed over time,  my hair is grey, Mikey doesn't have much hair.  We are proud of our daughter and our grandaughter and we are happy most of the time.  We still can make each other laugh.  We are married!

And every single April 2 for the last 44 years, Mikey has brought me yellow roses....

Oh yes, most definitely romantic!


  1. AWWW Mellodee, that is just the sweetest post. By my time, I am about an hour late, but Happy Anniversary. Your wedding sounds like it was so lovely, and how very sweet that he brings you yellow roses like you carried in your wedding. How very funny that he was hung over! I'm so sorry you don't have photographs, but you obviously have wonderful pictures of all of it in your mind. It is amazing that none of you thought of music. My husband and I have been married 41 years, and I was 19 when we married also. So glad your surgery went well, and that you are able to be back on the computer. laurie

  2. Happy Anniversary. ((44)) is impressive. This year will me #40 for me mine:)

  3. Mellodee, this is SUCH a sweet post!! I love it! Happy anniversary to a very cute couple. You do not look old enough to have been married 44 years! I guess a happy life allows you to age well. :)

  4. I left you a post yesterday to wish you a Happy must have floated off in to blog land..:) so I will say Happy 44th Anniverary once again. Blessings. Dee

  5. 44 years! That's definitely something to be congratulated for. Great story about the wedding. And Happy (late) Anniversary!


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