I make absolutely no judgement of their family size or of their reasoning or desire to have so many children....that is completely the mom and dad's decision! Both mom and dad have Master's Degrees in a lucrative field. I would suppose there is no question of their ability to support so many kids. I believe their religious faith encourages large families, but I don't judge that either! Their religion, their kids, their choice!
All of that said, I just cannot fathom having so many people around All. The. Time!! Even those who have fewer than 12 but more than 3 are beyond my comprehension on any real level. My immediate family has never had more than 5 people in it! Mom, Dad, Me, and Little Sis....or Mikey, Ratchlet and Me.... or Mikey, Ratchlet, TA, M-t-G, and me! That's it! Plus assorted dogs!
Being the product of a small family, I just can't imagine the lack of privacy, the noise, somebody always needing something, the fights, the confusion that must frequently occur. My mother (as I have mentioned frequently) was one of 11 children. Surprisingly, as I think back about the stories she told, I don't think she mentioned any of those things as a problem. I think that's a little odd.
The Big Guy is one of 7 children. He never said anything bad about it either. Hmmmm....what could it mean???
Of course, I never asked either my grandmother or Mikey's mom how they felt about having a full house. I'm pretty sure both of them would have looked at me strangely for wondering how they "felt" about having so many children. They just loved whatever kids that came along. It's what people did (this was waaaaay before The Pill!)
Both Little Sis and I are "almost only children". We actually only lived in the same place for 7 years. For all intents and purposes, from birth to age 12 I was an only child, she was an only child from 7 until she got married. Even when we did live in the same place, I always had my own room. Mom always thought there were just too many years between us to have to share a room. So Little Sis was in with Mom and Dad until I moved out to get married. In retrospect, I felt bad about that....but was sure glad about keeping my own room then!! (Mother Theresa I wasn't!)
There is something so comforting about having a place you can go to shut out the rest of the world when you are angry or sad or stressed! After Ratchlet went off to grad school, I got my own little room again (no, I didn't take her room!! We moved to a different house.)
I wonder if the mom of 12 has her own little room where she can chant over and over "Baby, Baby, All the Time" One baby after another, baby, baby, baby..... If she doesn't, I don't see how she stays sane! For me, that's about 11 kids too many!! In fact, if I were her, I might go in that room, lock the door , and stay there until all those children move out!! :)
I really admire women with large families, but I agree, I have a hard time imagining myself doing that without feeling like I was going crazy!! Two is a perfect number for me. :)
ReplyDeleteOMG! I had two children and some times that was too many! I cannot imagine, no do I even want to imagine what having a house full would be like. I have friends who have 3 sets of twins plus one single, and when they were all small, it was chaos, but Mom and Dad were very patient and kind, AND well organized. My wife and I used to invite their clan over to our house for cookouts. They were amazed at the invites. They always said that nobody ever invited them anywhere. We always had a great time. Our two were friends with their older 4, so it was cool. But as full time, NO WAY!
ReplyDeleteThink "The Waltons."
JE
I'm one of eight kids. I have no idea how my mom and dad did it! None of us had more than 3 kids ourselves.
ReplyDeleteI don't think that woman would ever find the time to go into a room by herself and lock the door! I've heard that, when families are that big, the older children raise the younger ones, and the family creates strong bonds. I'm bonded enough with my 2 children. I couldn't have handled more. laurie
ReplyDelete